Reminders of the Past
I think this time of year is really great for reflecting on your life overall and just over the past year. I think what really shines through is the people in your life during the holidays. Sure this can sometimes mean you are exchanging gifts, going to parties, or even going to dinners with them but I really don't mean just that. Obviously the people that are closest to you are the ones you are checking off your list of people to buy gifts for. Those are going to be the people you spend the most time with or feel the closest to in certain ways. The holidays, however, also remind us of maybe times in the past with people you don't get to see too often anymore. The things all around us are constantly reminding us of people in our lives. Sometimes this can even be when you least expect it.
Just today I was doing a ton of holiday baking. I always like to put together tins of cookies for some people as gifts so we really needed to get to it and crank out our cookies this weekend. I got to decorating our usual sugar cookies which brought back memories of decorating them with friends for a number of years. We haven't done it in a few years now since we are adults and time got the best of us, but it made me reach out to them. We have been messaging back and forth for a little while now and I am so happy I did. It really is so nice reaching out to someone you were so close to at one time but have drifted apart from. Usually it is small things like these that remind us of important people in our lives no matter how often we talk to them.
Sadly this can work both ways as well. Perhaps there is something about this time of year or something around you that reminds you of a person that negatively impacts your life. Just this week I decided to change up the pictures I have hanging up in my cubical at work because some of them had a person in them that I really just consider a negative person in my life now. I figured it was something that just needed to be done since this person is no longer a positive impact in my life. For my own mental health it just made sense to remove those pictures. I can also think of a gift someone gave me years ago that is no longer in my life. This gift was handmade so there was a certain level of guilt I felt getting rid of it. I recently threw it away since I have no connection with this person anymore and have no reason to keep it. I felt a huge sense of relief when I did this and they guilt was completely gone. Getting rid of these types of things like pictures or gifts gave me a lot of closure. It is almost like, at least for me, that final door that needs to be shut so you can move on with the people in your life that remain to be a positive influence.
Things and events really do remind us of the people in our lives quite often. I have mentioned both positive and negative examples. I want you to think about the things that remind you of certain people in your life. Maybe you put up a special Christmas ornament on your tree because it reminds you of someone every year and makes you smile. Maybe you will take out an old craft being made by a loved one like my mother did today. She took out an unfinished craft my grandma was working on before she passed, only to find her needle still sticking out of the yarn. Such a small little thing can be such a huge reminder of someone very special in your life. Take that time to think of the negative examples of this as well. I would encourage you to get rid of the things that remind you of negative people. They are only going to tether you to the negative feelings. I can tell you first hand that it is a very big sigh of relief when you do.
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