Happy Sunday Everyone! I want to start off by asking anyone reading this... how are you doing? You can answer this in your head, leave a comment telling me, or anything you want as long as you take a moment to think about how you are actually doing. I am not sure how other countries and cultures, or even other parts of the US respond to "how are you?" but I know where I am it is pretty common to just say "good, how are you?" right back. It is essentially just a standard way of greeting someone. If you are having a great day, horrible day, overall just feeling any way at all you most likely still respond with "good, how are you?" as if it is just a casual greeting. I want you to actually think about it for a moment and think about where you are both mentally and physically at the moment before we move on to the topic for today.

I have been struggling lately. I might sound like a broken record here, and I know I talked about a similar topic very recently but this is what is on my mind this week, and I always try to stick to writing about just that. We all make New Year goals and challenges for ourselves, well here we are almost 2 full months into 2021 and where are you with those goals? I saw a video online a few days ago that asked the viewer just that, and it hit me pretty hard. Out of everyone I know, everyone seems to be struggling in some way right now. I want you to know, again, that that is okay. It is a perfectly valid human emotion and response to stress and trauma. The past 12 months have been something none of us have seen in our lifetime. A pandemic that has killed almost 2.5 million people worldwide, an absolutely ridiculous seemingly never-ending election in the US, an attack on one of our nations historic buildings, I could go on and on but I don't need to. Some people are able to deal with the news in a positive way while others not as much. It is completely understandable to be struggling right now!

Now of course I am all about positivity, it is right in the name of my page, but as anyone that has read my past entries also knows that I encourage everyone to also deal with their negative emotions and experiences as well. Toxic positivity is a real thing, and I am not about that at all. We are humans capable of feeling a vast array of emotions and ignoring any of them is not healthy. So let me get to my point here. Yesterday I had my first training session at the gym in a few weeks. In between sets we always chat a little bit. Sometimes about things in our lives, and others relating to the gym or working out of course. I got to mentioning how my motivation is at an all time low right now and he asked me to think about why that was. The truth is I am emotionally just burnt out. Work has been busy and somewhat stressful, the things on the news lately has been getting to me, I have been worrying so much about other people I, once again, am not making myself a priority. I like to think I have a good heart, but sometimes in some ways that comes at my own expense. It is okay to take some time for you. It is okay to struggle. The best piece of advice I can give is one I am also giving to myself: Keep trying to make yourself a priority.

Think of it as how they ask you to put your oxygen mask on in a plane, before you go helping others with theirs. I know this analogy is so overused but it fits. If you are neglecting yourself a resource needed to calm down and survive, you won't be able to help as many people. If you pass out, you are not helping anyone. If you put the oxygen on first you then are taking care of you so that you can then extend that and help others. If you are a mother this probably rings so true. I do not have any children yet, but I see how they can sometimes make themselves the lowest priority on their list. Feed the kids, get the laundry done, get the kids bathed and ready for bed, and by the time that happens they are exhausted and move along to do it all again in the morning. Of course some things can't be put off, but if you take some time to mentally and physically care for yourself, you'll be even more successful the next day. This goes for every last one of us.

I need to make the gym a priority again. I need to get better at meal planning again. I need to take more time to relax, and not let the stress of the work day pile up so by the time 5:30pm hits I have no interest in going to the gym. I need to turn off the news sometimes and watch something mindless and fun. A Harry Potter movie marathon, start a new fiction book, write some poetry or journal, dance around in my bedroom in my pjs, bake a loaf of bread because I want to and not for a specific meal, do some yoga or even a nice reflection meditation, go to the gym and get back to a place where I enjoy it and it doesn't feel like a chore again. I know all of these things are things that I enjoy that I need to make more time for rather than just working and eating and sleeping. I need to push them to the top of the list and make time for them and not feel guilty or that I should be doing something more productive. If any of this is sounding familiar, it sounds like you also need to make yourself a priority. Take some time for you. Take some time to recover from the crazy year we have all been living in together. Take some time to put you first.